


5 Hours Later

by dinoswhore



Category: Bandom, My Chemical Romance
Genre: IT'S GAY, M/M, can be read as AU or non-AU, i think, uhh hospital fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-06
Updated: 2018-11-06
Packaged: 2019-08-19 17:25:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16538993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinoswhore/pseuds/dinoswhore
Summary: Gerard's in the hospital and Frank is his stupid best friend who waits for him.





	5 Hours Later

**Author's Note:**

> nyello, i wrote this a while back, but i'm posting this to ao3 since i finally got approved for an account. 
> 
> enjoy!

Frank bit the side of his fingernail anxiously. It had been five hours since Gerard had been admitted. Five hours where Frank sat in silent terror that Gerard wasn't alright, that his very closest friend would be taken away from Frank.

He remembered faintly when he got the phone call. It seemed like days ago, even though it was only just last night.

"Hello?"

"Is this Frank Iero?"

"Yes this is he."

"Gerard Way has been in a car accident. He has you listed as his emergency contact."

"What? Is he alright?"

"He's being brought to the hospital at this moment, sir. You can come visit him."

"I-yes. I'll be there."

He drew in a shaky breath. They had told him that Gerard had broken two limbs and would be needing surgery due to internal bleeding. He guessed that that was what was happening at this moment.

Frank's hand kept twitching towards his back pocket, where he carried a lighter and a pack of cigarettes. He knew he couldn't have one, he was in the hospital after all. Sighing, he leaned back in the uncomfortable plastic chair.

He'd been hoping, fuck that, praying, to the God he rejected, that he wouldn't lose Gerard.

If he died today, the burning love that Frank held for Gerard would live on. It would live even if its recipient didn't.

And Frank didn't think he could deal with that.

Frank was weak. And the only thing that kept him going, that kept him from falling apart, was Gerard. When he held Frank after a particularly bad day Gerard would joke that he was his hero, but he never knew just how right he was.

He prayed to the God that didn't exist that Gerard would live, even if it meant that he would never love Frank the way Frank loved him. He could live with that. He could carry on admiring from afar. Gerard was the sun, and Frank had always stood in the half-shadows. He would rarely, if not ever, stray even closer, lest he burn himself.

If Gerard did live, admiring afar was what would probably happen. He'd come back, he'd be happy and clueless, and Frank would keep pining hopelessly. Fantasizing about Gerard replying Frank seriously whenever he said those horrible three words.

"Frank Iero?" A nurse stuck her head out of Gerard's room. He looked up.

"Yes?" He curled his fingers around his hoodie.

We have some news for you.

You might want to sit down.

Does Mr Way have any family?

"You can visit Gerard now. He's awake but remember that he's on medication so he might not be in his right mind." Frank nodded semi-impatiently, really just wanting to see Gerard.

She opened the door for him and he rushed in, stopping when he saw Gerard.

He looked so fragile. An IV was stuck in his uninjured arm, keeping a steady supply of morphine in his bloodstream. His other arm and one of his legs were wrapped in casts. His eyes were halfway open, watching Frank drowsily or flickering around the pale room.

But he was still his sun, filling him to the brim with a delightful heat.

"Lindsey?" He muttered. Frank huffed in laughter. Apparently to Gerard's drug-riddled mind he looked like a lady.

"No Gerard, it's Frank." He walked over to the hospital and sat down in the chair by Gerard's head.

Gerard sighed and shifted around in the hospital bed, crinkling his nose. "I'm glad it's you and not Frank."

He froze and looked down, biting back unnecessary tears. Maybe that was how Gerard really felt about him. People say when a person is under the influence that is their true self, right? Maybe Frank should have just gone and signed the forms. He shouldn't have come.

But wait. Gerard put him down as his emergency contact. Whatever he meant to him, Frank would see this through. After all, Gerard was pumped full of drugs, what's the harm?

"Why?" Frank asked, trying his best to keep his voice from shaking. Gerard shrugged, nonchalant, not seeing the subtle effect his words had on Frank.

"It's just...like--you know. They put a fuck-ton of drugs in me and...I don't exactly have a mind to mouth filter right now." Gerard raised his eyebrows and cocked his head in a gesture that reminded Frank of a really cute dog. "Like, I'll say shit without running it through my head first. What if strippers had poles that were, like, pillars? That would be cool."

Frank smiled, but bit his lip. "What does having no filter have to do with him?"

Gerard blushed suddenly, a really adorable pink dusting which turned into a brilliant red that made Frank want to hug him and never let go.

"Um...I can tell you right, Linds?"

Frank nodded, and Gerard looked down at his fingers.

"I'm scared," he said, so quietly that Frank almost didn't hear him. He furrowed his brow.

"Scared of what?" Of Frank? What?

Gerard frowned.

"I-I'm scared that I'll just suddenly blurt out exactly what I don't want him to hear."

Frank tilted his head. If he was honest, he was a little hurt. He had assumed that they were close enough that they wouldn't have secrets from one another. And then he realized that this was pretty hypocritical on his part. Whoops.

"Well, what is it?" He leaned forward minutely, waiting in quiet dread and a sliver of hope. And maybe a little guilt for not coming clean and saving Gerard the embarrassment.

Gerard's blush darkened.

"Well--I mean--I do want to tell him, badly, you know that. But..." He twisted at a piece of his flaming red hair nervously. "We've been friends for far too long and I don't want to wreck everything." He had a small smile and a faraway look on his face.

"He means the world to me, y'know? You do know, yeah. And I don't want a shitty proclamation of love to ruin all that."

Frank almost lost his cool. He could feel his face burning and his heart pounding. He willed his heart to be still and for himself to not do something stupid like bolt or kiss Gerard passionately.

Hoping that his voice wouldn't come out shaky, he opened his mouth.

"How do you know he doesn't feel the same way?"

Gerard sighed. "He told me so."

Ah yes, Frank remembered that day too well.

\---

It had been a few weeks ago. It was late, and the two of them were drinking and marathoning the Nightmare On Elm Street series when Frank felt a weight on his lap, previously being on his shoulder. He almost jumped when he realized that it was Gerard's head, but years of practice and control kept him still. He snuggled down, the other side of his face pressed on Frank's thigh, eyes fixed on Freddy Kreuger, arms clutching the blanket close. Frank died form how cute he looked curled up like that, like a cat. And Frank was a dog person.

After ten minutes or so of this torture, he pushed himself up and shuffled to face Frank.

Then Frank was dying inside all over again because Gerard was leaning in and all he could focus on was his pink lips.

But wait.

They had both been drinking a lot and Frank knew that Gerard was a lightweight, somehow, even though he drank even more than Frank. He was intoxicated. He wasn't in his right mind, the one that didn't feel this way with Frank.

And it physically pained Frank to do so, but he leaned away from Gerard's face. He watched as a multitude of emotions ran over it, deciphering each with an accuracy that only the closest of people could achieve.

Confusion. Guilt. Sadness. Anger. Shame.

It settled on resignation, at last.

"I-I can't." Frank murmured, face burning, "I-I don't--"

"Did you regret that?" Gerard was watching him inquisitively. Frank was still dumbfounded.

No, fuck no, he didn't regret it.

But Gerard would.

But Gerard was drunk out of his mind. "Um-yes, yes I do, it's been a long night and--"

He was interrupted by Gerard getting off the couch and walking to the door.

"I should go," he said, quietly, with his back to Frank.

"Gerar--" He watched as the other man's grip on the doorknob tightened almost imperceptibly.

"Save it Frank. I'll see you tomorrow."

He left him with a beer in his hand and a strangely cold side.  
\---

After that Gerard wasn't the same with Frank.

He was colder. He avoided him or just plain ignored him whenever they met, talking to other people and leaving Frank forlorn and regretful. The night he went drinking alone, making Frank worry so bad, this is what had come from it.

"He'd never feel like this with me," he scoffed, "why would he, I mean, I know for sure that he can get people so much better than me."

Frank wanted so badly to tell him that for him, there was no one better Gerard.

"He's like, from a whole other universe from me. He's just so--so, so damn pretty, y'know? And I've known him for so long and he never--he never gets sick of me. Everyone else always does but I don't want him to." Gerard sighed.

"And I'm just me. I don't know why he sticks around. We've been friends for like, what, eight years? And he's still stickin' around. Well he used to. I'm not so sure if he still does. I did tell you I tried to kiss him right?"

Frank made a strange sound in the back of his throat. He was too dumbstruck to do much else, really.

Gerard laughed quietly, a sorrowful sound. "It was so weird between us after we almost kissed. Can I let you in on a secret?"

He leaned in almost conspiratorially towards Frank. Under his spell, he leaned in too.

"I think he thinks I'm mad at him but I also think that he's mad at me," he stage-whispered. He dropped back down onto his pillows. "Do you think he'll stop being mad at me? I really wanted to kiss him. I still do but back then I was drunk. I didn't think it through." He looked plaintively at Frank. "I don't want him to hate me, Linds."

Frank's heart clenched. It hurt him to know that Gerard thought that he hated him. He didn't know how to tell him that he didn't, that in fact it was the very opposite.

"I'm starting to lose feeling in my fingers," Gerard said absentmindedly. Frank started. Because he didn't want him to be stoned out of his damn mind, he reached over to turn the dial down, restrict the amount of morphine going through the IV that extended into his arm.

Gerard hated needles, Frank mused. He tried his best to speak around the lump in his throat. "I think you should talk to him, Gerard."

Gerard looked at Frank from where he was resting his neck on the pillows.

"You think so?"

"Yeah. He'll be visiting you soon." He knew that for sure, because he was Frank. Obviously.

"But...what if he does hate me? Will he still visit me then?"

Frank reached out and held Gerard's hand and squeezed it gently. He tingled from this point of contact. "He doesn't hate you," he soothed him. Gerard still looked worried.

"Are you sure? You don't know Linds, I was way out of line there, and he--I--he has to forgive me or--or-"

Frank stood up and pressed Gerard's hand. "Gerard!" He snapped, "just calm down. Why don't you understand that I'm not angry at you? How much does it take?" He dropped his hand. "I never could be." Frank sat down resignedly.

He was tired. Better to get it out in the clear and hope that he would forget this.

He watched as Gerard's face went through another series of emotions, from confusion to comprehension to sick horror.

"Oh." He backed up futilely into his pillows and picked at his sheets. Frank almost wanted to tell him to stop before he put a hole in them. "Oh, Frank. I'm--I'm so sorry, I didn't mean anything I swear I'm on a lot of morphine and please oh god just please please don't hate me, oh God, I'm so, I'm so so sorry and."

At this point Gerard's eyes were listening with tears and he wasn't looking Frank in the eye. "And you're the closest thing to home I have and if I lose you I'll--"

"Stop talking." Gerard's face dropped and he bunched up the sheets with shaking fingers.

"But I want to fix this Frank, I really--" Frank smiled.

"No, stop talking so I can kiss you," he said. It was almost unreal that Gerard actually thought that about him. Wow.

Gerard's cheeks turned pink. "I-really? For real?" Frank nodded and held his hand again.

"For real. I'm in love with you too, idiot." Gerard ducked his head bashfully, his face bright red.

Frank leaned forward in his chair and cupped Gerard's face. It was a little awkward, what with Gerard not being able to move at all and both of them being blushing pink, but it was all Frank had wanted for the past five years.

When their lips met, there wasn't any fireworks or anything. I mean it wasn't a shitty fanfic. ...yeah. But Gerard's lips were incredibly soft and damn he was a good kisser.

And he was Gerard. After eight years of wanting, this was beautiful. He tasted like familiarity, like walking into a warm home after a wintery vacation.

He pulled back and Frank had to stop himself from whining because it turned out that Gerard's lips might be the only drug he needed. They pressed their foreheads together and Gerard stroked Frank's cheekbone.

"I'm in love with you," Gerard said, almost in amazement, in awe.

"I'm in love with you too," Frank smiled. This was everything he had wanted.

**Author's Note:**

> please comment something! i love reading comments on my works, like just say anything. ANYTHING. im thorsty
> 
> hmu on twitter at oceaniach_ee (i would link my tumblr but i barely use it anymore so :/)


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